Info about The Happiness Project
A few years ago, as I was just figuring out that I might need
to try and improve my mental health a speck (*cough, understatement), I
discovered Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Happiness Project. This book details Rubin’s yearlong study/quest
to improve her own personal happiness, and to determine if in fact certain
practices CAN increase happiness.
Spoiler alert: Yes. Certain practices CAN increase happiness.
Yay!
I like projects. I like research. I knew I would like this
book, and I did. I re-read it at the
beginning of last year as part of my quest to get some zen COME HELL OR HIGH
WATER…er, I mean, work peacefully at becoming happy and chill and zentastic
instead of just frantically waiting for the other shoe to drop as we entered a
new season of less frequent MRIs and hopefully less medical smite, after a
decade plus of hospital time galore, topped off with several months in 2016 of
highly improbable medical ugh.
Obviously, the work continues, as I am now repeating, “I did
not just jinx us. I did not just jinx us. I did not just jinx us.”
Ergh. Zen.ANYWAY, there are a lot of things in Rubin’s book that have really stuck with me since I first read it. When I decided to write ABOUT the book as part of this blog, I resisted the urge to go back and flip through the pages. What are the lessons/ideas that STAYED with me? THESE were the things that I should include in any writings, because really—the things I remember without looking back at the book are the things that stuck with me the most.
There are many. I highly recommend this book.
Probably the most important one, the one I reference the most in daily zen-pursuit, is “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good”.
Reading through Rubin’s meticulous and conversational record of her research methods, I was a speck intimidated by HER perfection (she would probably argue that point, but really—she is intensely talented and driven; her process inspires me). Still—this has become a mantra that I repeat OFTEN.
I am perhaps a bit of a perfectionist.
Sorry, I should have told you to sit down before I unleashed that shocker on you.
Sadly, I am not the “house in perfect order/always perfectly coiffed/entertaining goddess/paint the cookies with replicas of the Sistine Chapel ceiling” kind of perfectionist. I just get paralyzed by things NOT being perfect, and turn into a speed bump. Especially as I navigated years of medical ugh, I got buried by my life because I just couldn’t figure out the perfect way to hold everything together—and so everything sort of got figuratively MacGyvered or ignored.
This does not create zen.
Although really, how awkward would it be to eat a Sistine Chapel ceiling cookie?
Taking to heart Rubin’s mantra “Don’t let the perfect be the
enemy of the good” has really, really helped me get more done in my life and
NOT be constantly stressed with how not perfect things are. So not every seam
was perfect in my daughter’s memory quilt I sewed for Christmas—but it was
good. Really good. So I didn’t waste time ripping out tiny imperfections my
visually impaired kid would never notice. So the PowerPoint I put together to
help my students who need printed out aids for note taking doesn’t have cool
animation or interesting graphics—it is good, and serves the purpose for which
it’s designed.
Honestly, I frequently say “Don’t let the perfect be the
enemy of the good” out loud, when I am doing anything creative especially.
Perfectionism is the opposite of zen. And for far, far too long I have been
sort of tangled in an impossible perfectionistic paralysis. Just for this one mantra, reading The
Happiness Project was a win.
If only just to make myself get that second blog entry out in
the first week or January—"Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good" is a win. Still have 1 hour and 46
minutes left in the day! Woo! I will get to put a gold star in my bullet
journal…another Happiness Project insight for next week. J If you are so inclined, pick up a copy and check it out for yourself—or listen to Oprah Winfrey’s interview with Gretchen Rubin on the most recent Super Soul Sunday podcast. That’s a great way to get a quick version of some of the key points of the book.
Just Don’t Let the Perfect be the Enemy of the Good!
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